Is there a right answer?

Sorry... I'm really lacking in posts these days. It's this whole winter thing... I hate it. Our winters have turned into a life sentence of nothingness. Winter activities are a thing of the past. Skating & tobogganing don't work well in -25 or +10. At least not with an 11 month old. What happened to the amazing winter weather that is in between?? The weather that makes you want to play outside in the wonderful snow building forts and going on adventures. What ever happened to those days? Geez life has changed since I was a kid. Everything is so scheduled. Play dates... activities. When I was a kid you'd just run out the front door in the morning and come home to eat. You'd have a slew of best friends to adventure with on the street and it was just go go go 'til suppertime. There was so much time spent outside because the weather just rocked. Tobogganing... skating... playing in the soccer fields. Today I sent my son out to see if a friend of his wanted to play. Just walk over there. Knock on the door and ask if he can play. My husband said why don't you just call his mom? Cuz I don't want to. It was fun for Sam to get dressed up and wander down the street to his buddy's house. And it felt good.... until I started imagining the possibility that horrible things could happen to him and I would be to late to ever find him again. But they didn't. I sat by the window and waited. He came home. That's the problem. Too much worry. I wish kids could just go out and explore like we used to.... without all the worry. Did our parents worry? I guess I could let them wander... give them freedom. But then what if something did happen? How could I live with it? Wondering if it would have been different if I had just been more careful... more strict. Was it bad parenting when we were young to not know where your kids were? Out playing somewhere. Having fun. Is it bad parenting now? Highly likely. I could let my kids go up the street to the park to play. I'd know where they are. How much fun would they have going alone? It's a better adventure than playing in the yard. What makes them old enough? Age? Awareness?

Is there a right answer?

Rock My Wednesdays.

Well it's probably a good thing that my last post fell on Tuesday, because if I had written something about my husband going back to work AFTER 2 Wednesdays ago there probably would have been a lot of swearing. Last week's & today's Wednesdays were A LOT better. In fact, I straight up rocked them. But let's go back a couple of weeks...

I work until 5:30 at the daycare and swimming lessons are at 6:30. In that hour I have to gather my oldest 2 (who are at daycare with me)... pick up Sofie from her daycare... feed the older kids & get them organized for swimming... calculate Juliet's carbohydrates & insulin requirements for supper... entertain Sofie... drive to the Y... get the kids changed & poolside STAT. Oh yes. Now if you don't think that any of that is a big deal then you can go read someone elses' blog. If you'd like to read about how I turned my worst nightmare into an organized evening with time on my side... do read on.

So my first attempt at this Wednesday evening thing was pretty scary. I managed to get the kids out of the daycare at 5:30 and was able to pick up Sofie and get home by like 5:45. I hauled everyone inside (my first mistake) and sat the kids at the table & Sof on the kitchen floor. She eats at daycare (phew). She was happy (lucky for me) to sit there with a cookie while I made the other 2 a gourmet meal of peanut butter sandwiches. Then it was time to grab the swimming gear... re-dress & get out the door. In the family changing room with babe in arms I probably sounded like a dictator the way I had to verbally maintain Sam & J's focus on getting into swim stuff. Time was not on our side and they aren't the best at staying focused. We actually made it in time, believe it or not.

Just when you think you can sit & relax for half an hour while the kids swim, the baby on your lap squeals & squirms because who wants to sit on mama's lap when there's a whole (wet) pool area to explore? Pool decks gross me out and there was NO WAY Sofie was going anywhere but on my lap. She didn't think that was much fun... nor did I after 15 minutes. Grrrrr. Then comes the end of the lessons. Getting the kids out of the wading pool after a lesson is always fun and it's even more fun when you have a 25lb baby to carry around who is trying desperately to escape. What is also loads of fun is the chaos in the awesome family change room after a lesson. Who's idea was it to make the FAMILY change room at the Y the size of a walk-in-closet anyway? Sofie wasn't going down in there either and so again with the dictatorship to attempt a quick & smooth transition from swimsuits to PJs... which was way too much to hope for.... but I totally kept my cool. Shocking, I know.

By the time we got home it was an hour past Sofie's bedtime so I hurried to get her down. It was an hour past everyone's bedtime for that matter, but I had to tackle homework & snacks before the other 2 were actually ready for bed. Trying to take bedtime snack away from my kids is like telling them Santa doesn't exist. END OF THE WORLD. Nine o'clock rolled around before they were getting tucked in. Awesome. Breathe.

Needless to say some serious planning needed to go into the next Wednesday if I was going to A) tackle it again alone and B) do it without valium. Lol. So.....

Swimming bag was packed & ready to go when I left for work... towels, suits, goggles & jammies. There was no way we were going home after the daycare round-up. What a waste of time getting the kids out of the car to eat & then back into the car to head to the Y. This time I planned to hit up a drive-thru for supper and bring it to the Y but my husband actually cooked up some KD before he went to work so after getting Sofie I swung by the house and ran in to grab it. Sorta drive-thru-ish. The kids ate at the Y and I put Sofie in the play care because she was bound to have more fun crawling around in there then sitting on my lap poolside. GENIUS I tell ya! I was able to help the kids get ready for lessons and poolside with like 10 minutes to spare!! Tonight we did the same thing but hit the McDonalds drive-thru (ya ya I know... brutal) AND I squeezed in some nursing time for Sofie as well. Booyah! It was fabulous. So fabulous that I think in January I'm going to turn 2 of my weekday evenings into trips to the Y and add in some swimming for Sofie, floor hockey for Sam & some MUCH needed yoga for me. Ambitious? Maybe. Worth a try? Hell yeah.

New Beginnings!

If you recall, Sam lost his first (top) front tooth back in July. Well it only took 7 weeks for him to finally lose the other!

He pulled it out the day before school started, which was 3 weeks ago!! Unfortunately the tooth fairy completely forgot to pay him a visit and he was surprised to find his tooth the next morning right where he left it, under his pillow. "It must be because you crawled into bed with me in the middle of the night Sam... the tooth fairy didn't know where you were." Sam took care of that the next night. Before climbing into bed with me he pulled the tooth out from under his pillow and left it out in plain view so that the tooth fairy was sure not to miss it. Thankfully she didn't.

If you read my blog regularly you'll know about my ups & downs (well mostly downs) with Sofie and how I am constantly asking questions & looking for answers about why she cries every day, all day. So... my latest theory is that I have a foremilk/hind milk imbalance... which is what I always though my problem was with Sam & Juliet, but never knew what to call it. Foremilk quenches thirst, is low in fat & high in lactose & carbs. Hind milk is high in fat and is what makes them feel full. Too much foremilk causes gassines, fussiness, explosive poo, irregular sleeping patterns.... basically everything Sofie does. Both Sam & Juliet drank formula in addition to breastfeeding so my low fat milk wasn't an issue. Sofie often refuses to drink a bottle... so she is getting far less formula. Basically nothing. Soooooooo.... for the past few days I've been treating myself for this imbalance by block feeding. What is block feeding you ask? I feed Sofie from one boob for 6-12 hours and then switch. This way, the boob I'm not feeding from gets engorged and stops producing milk. Eventually the idea is that my boobs will get the message to not produce so much milk, and the less milk in your boobs the higher the fat content. To deal with the engorgement I pump just a little bit so that I am comfortable, which is not enough to signal my boob to produce more milk. So 2 things.... Today was Sofie's BEST day ever, so it just may be working... AND... from the pumping it's obvious that my milk is like water!!! I showed it to my girlfriend today and she was like whoa... your milk is watery dude. Her's doesn't look like that at all she said... her's looks like whole milk. Here's a pic of my skim....

This is just under 4oz. If you look closely you can see that at the very top there is a thin layer, which took hours to separate, that looks like whole milk. So there is VERY little fat... which is what Sofie needs to feel full.  LET'S HOPE THIS BLOCK FEEDING WORKS!!!! Today was great. Papa went golfing & Sofie & I were home alone. I was scared, I admit. I have a hard time dealing with Sofie's fussing all alone. It's something you REALLY need a break from after a while. So I thought it would be a great day for my girlfriend to come over with her kiddies to help keep us distracted. SUCCESS!  Sofie barely cried all day!! We went to the mall & hung out! It was so..... NORMAL!! We had a great day!!!

Later on, we even went to the park & climbed trees!

And did some sliding..

And some swinging!!

It was nice to feel a bit normal. I hope it lasts.

AND.... if you look REALLY closely at that last picture, you can see what else we did today!!! Yay us!!

our fam

My blog is lacking. I wish I had more time to post because I have lots of stuff I want to share. I'm still having a REALLY REALLY hard time with Sofie. Tonight I got a chance to write a letter to my midwife. It sort of sums up what I am going through right now & how I feel about it. It's pretty emo but I am desperately hoping that she might be able to help us somehow. I wonder a bit if I should be sharing this on my blog... is it too personal? I don't think so. This blog is about my life & my family & this is what we are going through right now. This is how I express myself. So... In the event that you might be interested in hearing all about my hardships (again) with a new baby here's an excerpt from my letter. You'd think I'd have this baby rearing thing down pat by now. Evidently not.

... It all started out wonderfully but as the days went on she became more and more difficult. More crying, less sleeping. Her crying isn't quiet either. She screams bloody murder. It's now to a point where I just don't know what to do. From the minute we get up in the morning to the minute I can finally get her to sleep at night she is either crying or nursing. There is hardly an in between. Mere minutes of the day are spent not nursing or crying. I am the only one who can calm her because the only thing that clams her is to nurse. I am not exaggerating when I say that my ENTIRE day is spent on the couch nursing. She will fall asleep but will wake up almost as soon as I pull my nipple from her mouth. She basically does not nap at all during the day. Some days I will spend hours nursing her until she falls asleep, putting her down, and having her wake up minutes later to start all over again. Eventually I give up trying to nap her. Her nights are not so bad. She wakes up every couple of hours, some nights she will sleep longer. What is difficult during the night is getting her back to sleep.... but that is not even what concerns me. It's the daytime. We changed her formula a few times at first and ended up giving her a gentle formula with less lactose. But that didn't change anything. And now she barely takes a bottle so I don't think it's a formula thing. We've tried drops for colic, although I really don't think she has "colic". I've even given her chamomile & fennel tea because I read that it is supposed to be soothing for babies. No difference. She is not constipated, in fact her poo is quite liquid. Sometimes her poo is pretty mucousy (if that is even a word). But I assume this is normal in breastfed babies. While there are days that she has quite a bit of gas, I really don't think there is anything wrong with her. This is just how she is. I feel like if there was something actually wrong, even nursing wouldn't calm her, or there would be other symptoms. She does move a lot. If we put her in her bouncy chair for the small amount of time she will be alright in it, she kicks her legs vigorously. If you ask me though, it does not appear to be because she is in pain. She will do it without crying. Like I said... I am reluctant to believe there is anything "wrong" with her... she is just a difficult (very difficult) baby. It's like she is happy... to nurse. She smiles at me... she even smiles at her Dad sometimes. But ultimately all she wants to do is lie in my arms and be able to nurse all the time. Otherwise it's crying (screaming).

... Although I am physically exhausted, I am way more mentally exhausted. There are many precious moments you are supposed to enjoy with a new baby, and I feel that the only moments I am enjoying are the ones where I am getting a (very short) break from Sofie. This hurts me emotionally. I spend a lot of time nursing & crying because I am just so overwhelmed. Another thing that burns me emotionally is that I feel like I am not at all present in my other 2 kids lives right now. For everything they ask of me my answer is almost always "I can't because I have to nurse Sofie". The times where I am present with them 9 out of 10 times Sofie is screaming hysterically in the background or we are all sitting on the couch while I am nursing. This doesn't appear to affect them, but it greatly affects me. They definitely don't have the best of their mother right now, even when I am able to focus on them. It breaks my heart. My husband is off work now so he is 100% focused on taking care of them, but it is difficult for me to be so out of touch. My husband cannot take care of Sofie. She won't allow it. Some mornings after the kids are on the bus he can come and get her for a bottle while I sleep for a bit, but those are becoming fewer & fewer. Sofie is no longer interested in taking a bottle, in fact it makes her scream. It, along with a soother, is like a huge insult because what she really wants is the boob. So any breaks I get from her are vanishing.

Going out & about is very difficult too. Any time we have gone to run errands with Sofie I find myself scurrying off to nurse somewhere to stop her incessant crying. So her & I don't go out much because it's just easier to stay home. When the weather was nice for a bit we spent a lot of time outside, but even then the nursing just moved from the couch to a chair on the deck.

I have had friends mention that maybe I should stop nursing, but I can't even entertain the idea. First off, as crazy as it seems, I don't want to stop. I can't imagine taking away the one thing that is not only the best for her, but what she enjoys the most. I just wish there was a way to make it easier. With my other 2 kids, nursing was such a special time for me. With Sofie, although there are times it is special, it has become so difficult because it has taken over our lives. The idea of stopping is just as emotionally damaging to me as everything else. I don't know what to do. I find it difficult to believe this is normal. I know that a new baby is a lot of time & attention, but this seems outrageous. If my husband wasn't off work, I wouldn't be able to do it. I wouldn't be able to focus on Sam & Juliet. That makes me feel horrible as a mother because I feel like I should be able to take care of all 3 of my children. The only way I can put Sam & Juliet's needs first is to let Sofie scream, which is what happens if my husband is out during suppertime, or any other time Sam & Juliet need my undivided attention. Thankfully that very rarely happens because he is off work... but it doesn't stop me from feeling horrible about it. How do other moms do it? Not everyone has the privilege of having 2 parents at home. This just adds to my emotional exhaustion.

... I thought I could write to you because you have been with us from the start, and with your experience you may have some answers or ideas for us. I keep telling myself this will all be over eventually but I'm just worried about how long 'eventually' will be. Some days are easier than others. Some days I can handle it. But there are days that I just cry & want to scream because I can't handle it. I don't want to say "I don't know how much more of this I can take" because I am a mother... and I will take it.. every bit of it. But I am still exhausted... and maybe there is something you could say or suggest to help me. Arghhhhhhh!!!

So there you have it. Hopefully the next time I blog about this it will be better. I am really so excited to have 3 kids I just wish it was easier. I can't wait for this difficult time to be over so I can REALLY enjoy all 3 of them.

I really need to go to sleep... but I just wanted to share with you something that Sam brought home from school, which was really the intention of this post. It's his rendition, in plasticine, of our family. It's fabulous.

There's Papa, me & Sofie, Sam & Juliet. Isn't it great!! I LOVE it. I love when my kids are crafty. I love Juliet's drawings, even when they are about bad guys & bad guy families (which was her latest drawing). I should really do more crafts with them.

The 'Bad Guy' in Brockville...

Juliet came home today with a drawing she did...

This is the bad guy in Brockville. He has long hair, a yellow moustache and a dress. Slap a swastika on his forehead and you'd swear it's Charles Manson. In pink is Juliet & me. The bad guy is trying to get into our house but he can't because it is locked. Thank god! Why, I ask, is my almost 5 yr old daughter drawing these pictures?? Should I be concerned? She is not concerned when she is telling me about it. In fact, she seems to think it is funny. I'm not sure if this is the same bad guy who lives in a brown house near the tree with the shade, who has a trap to catch little kids. Not big kids... little ones. What is that? !! Do your kids talk about bad guys? Because it's every other topic or subject of play with Juliet. What happened to ponies & princesses??

third time is not a charm...

It's been a rough couple of days. It's actually been a rough 7 weeks but who's counting? Difficult babies are difficult! Geez. Hours and hours of breastfeeding daily takes it's toll. As much as I love the closeness & holding her it's a difficult pill to swallow being completely tied down to your baby... and your couch. Sofie will feed & then sooth literally for hours in a row. I just keep switching back & forth between boobs. It's crazy! Most of her awake time is spent nursing and if we stop she will cry 97% of the time. If I am lucky she will nap for an hour straight (or more if I am REALLY lucky) once a day. Today was NOT one of those days. She did, however, spend some quiet (and by that I mean not crying) awake time with Papa...

That was nice, for both of us. Even getting a break for 5 minutes is enough to refresh the levels of stress & patience. And when she smiles & coos that adds even more stamina to the next stretch of nursing & crying.
I'm really looking forward to more & more happy awake time. The night waking isn't even the issue anymore... it's the daytime crying. I can live with the waking every 1.5-3 hours. I just wish she would be happy when she's clean, fed & awake. Is that so much to ask? Apparently.

Two days ago I was home alone with the 3 kids and felt REALLY inadequate as a mom. It was supper time and I needed to feed Sam & Juliet. Sofie SCREAMED the whole time I cooked supper. Sam & Juliet tried to calm her down... but neither of them have boobs so that didn't work. It's very stressful to listen to your baby scream, especially when you are trying to take care of your other children. It made me feel horrible. If I responded to Sofie's screams then Sam & Juliet's needs would be put second. That makes it sound drastic but essentially that's what it was. It may not have been a huge big deal, and I just let Sofie cry, but the idea of it all made me sad. Now normally my husband is home to focus on the older 2 because he has 8 months of parental leave from work, but he was out. It made me think... what the heck would I do if we didn't have that privilege? If it was always just me? So I felt even more crappy because that was like saying I can't even take care of my 3 kids on my own. What do families/mom's do who are in that situation? With a newborn at home & other kids to attend to? How do they do it? Am I crazy to struggle? Should it be easier?

Is it just me or is the reality of caring for a newborn largely UNDER exaggerated? Sure it's a wonderful time... but it's way more of a difficult time. Am I crazy or does life seem to come to a screeching halt? Even if you don't want it to? The difficulty & needs of my new baby don't give me much more opportunity than to sit & nurse & sleep when I can. I cannot attempt or desire to accomplish anything other than caring for her if I want to get through the day with some level of sanity. Wanting to clean the house or rake the yard is far out of the question, because as soon as I want to accomplish something Sofie is crying &/or won't nap. If I don't accept that, my levels of stress are through the roof. I have to tell myself it's okay for me to accomplish nothing. Even though it makes me feel useless. I shouldn't say that because I am caring for a new born child... which is the very opposite of useless. But letting go of everything else is another challenge of newborn parenting I struggle with.

xo... a tired mom.

I would LOVE to hear about your difficult baby stories. Or about how you nursed for hours & hours on end. It's nice to know you're not alone. I decided to write a bit about this in the event that someone who is having a rough time might read it & feel better about themselves. I know that I would feel better knowing that other parents are going through or went through similar experiences. I can't even remember if I felt all of this with my first two. Was it as hard? Yes. It was different. I didn't have 2 older kids to care for. Was it easier to do nothing? I don't remember. I was a few years younger. Am I too old for this now? I couldn't be. I'm only 32. Who knows. Being a parent is very hard... even when it's your third time.

My Baby $#*! On My Manicure

Babies are crazy. Please... tell my people always say "enjoy them at this age"? Um... no! How 'bout i'll enjoy her when she stops the excessive crying and sleeps more than 2 hours in a row. I'll enjoy her when she can sit for longer than 10 minutes without crying. Don't get me wrong... LOVE her to death & cutest thing ever... but enjoyable? Not so much. Stressful? Bingo!

So I decided I would take a photo of my clock every time I got in & out of bed to illustrate my typical night time routine. Goes a little something like this...

She falls asleep at the boob... I put her down in her swing to sleep.

She cries. Up I get. Boob.

Back asleep... back in her swing.

Crying. Boob.

Asleep.

Awake. Boob.

Asleep.

 Crying again... up for a feed. A nice 3 hour stretch.

 Asleep after feeding... back in her swing.

Waaaaaaaaaaaa... Boob.

Back asleep... but not for long. She was up again at 7.






It's typical... but it's tough. And I think it would be easier if she was happier during the day, but there's a lot of crying there too.

On another note, the official arrival of spring has brought with it temperatures in the high twenties! Yay. It also brought mosquitoes. Boo! We've been spending our days doing yard clean-up & lounging on the back deck. Our back deck, which is new this year... KICKS ASS. We are LOVING it. I was hoping that the beautiful weather & time outside would make Sofie happier... not so much. But at least the rest of us are. Today I went for some me time & got a manicure & pedicure. Mmmmm clean feet. Sofie shat all over my manicure. Awesome. Bring her up to change a poopy diaper and just when I get her all cleaned up she unloads all over my nicely manicured hand. And while cleaning that up she pukes all over herself. So I clean that & she shits some more. When I'm sure she's done pooing I put on a diaper & clean clothes. And then she pukes all over her clean clothes. Seriously? Oh... and her poo smells like chamomile tea. Sweet.

Tea for Two

I'm determined to get the little one to sleep longer than 2 hours at night. It's ridiculous. Actually... it's not even the waking that's hard on me it's getting her back to sleep after. It shouldn't take 2 hours!! So, as I sat breast feeding her to sleep the other night I had an epiphany. What if I put a couple of drops of lavender essential oil in her crib... maybe she'd sleep better. So I did. Then I went even further... what if I gave her some chamomile tea before bed?! I immediately Googled it and lo & behold... TONS of moms soothe their babies with chamomile tea because it's safe, caffeine free, soothing & good for colic & gas. So... now before bed Sofie & I sit in her bedroom with the light's dim & have tea!!

I warm up about an ounce of pretty diluted tea (1 tea bag per 16 oz) but she doesn't like it very much so she's not drinking nearly that... a few sips from her bottle. But I figure if I keep offering it to her in a positive environment she will grow to like it... and maybe it will help her sleep! Yay!

un-motivated.

Sorry I haven't been blogging... I try to use the moments that Sofie isn't on my boob to sleep. It's been a rough month. A lot more crying and a lot less sleeping coming out of the new babe. I'm beginning to think that the idea of a "good baby" is a myth. Not that babies are bad... but the whole eat & sleep thing is highly exaggerated. It's more like eat & sleep but only if there is a boob in my mouth. And if there isn't then sleep for a few minutes before waking up & crying because my boob is gone. Throw a little painful gas & explosive poo into the mix and you've got it about right. Oh yes and lets not forget the hysterical crying for reasons that will be forever unknown to any parent. Third time around and it's not any easier. It's a good thing she's cute...

Random..

Hello December!

So were your kids as excited as mine to open the very first door of their very first advent calendar? Geez. I gave it to them on Monday and everyday this week they have been "reminding" me that they can only open it on Jeudi. But their idea of a reminder is more like a question just to make sure that they can't open it earlier. They eagerly searched for the first door so that they'd be ready for this morning.

They are so funny. They never cease to amaze me. Listening to their conversations... answering their questions. Juliet comes up with the craziest, but intelligent ideas...

"Mommy... what would happen if there was no more air?"
"Mommy... what would happen if there were no more trees?"
"Mommy... do people come from outer space?"
"Can children be astronauts or just grown ups?"
During an episode of House Hunters when 2 gay men were looking for a house.. "Mommy, are those men neighbours?" ... which led to my explanation of how sometimes boys love boys & girls love girls.
"Mommy... how does the baby eat in your tummy?"
In the very busy public bathroom at the Y... "Mommy... why do your underwear go up your butt?"

That's the last time I go to the bathroom at the same time as my kids... who knows what other questions they'll come up with.

Happy December!

insert appropriate title here because I have nothing nice to say...

I couldn't think of an appropriate title for this post because the subject matter only makes me think inappropriately. You never think it'll happen to your children. You never think it'll happen to you. You spend years watching other children & families suffer through it and pray it doesn't happen to you. Phew... another day unscathed. Not this time. This time we got hit and we got hit bad. This time we are the family suffering through the ordeal. This time.... we have lice.

I noticed that Juliet was itching her head a few days ago... Friday or Saturday. I didn't react to it.. because who wants to admit to themselves that it might be lice? But I did take note of it and thought it stood out as abnormal. The next day... I noticed that I too was itching my head unusually. Still... no reaction. Finally on Sunday night after a dip in the hot tub I recalled the itching and decided that while getting Juliet ready for bed I might as well check her head. F*$%. Saying that she had lice is an understatement. She had a frickin' colony. An infestation. She didn't have lice in her hair, she had hair in her lice.

You never really know what to do in this situation. My husband & Sam were still in the hut tub so I went & told them to get out because we had some work to do. Then I turned to the internet for answers. Of course I knew that I had to go by lice shampoo, but turning to Google is just a normal reaction. And a hopeless one at that. There really isn't much info. I mean there are home remedies, holistic remedies, toxic remedies & organic remedies but it all comes down to the same thing... the same answer that you DON'T want to hear. Treat with lice shampoo to kill the lice, but nothing kills the eggs. No matter what you do, hours of "nit" picking lie in your near future.

We decided that the first thing to do would be to check everyone's head, get some lice shampoo & strip the bedrooms of linen, clothes, stuffed animals etc. My husband's head is shaved bald so he was no worry, but we discovered a couple of lice in BOTH mine & Sam's hair. Awesome. So off my husband went to the pharmacy while I gathered anything that could possibly be infected and brought it down to the laundry room for loads & loads of laundry and dryer time for anything that can't be washed. Luckily, lice cannot live off the human head for longer than 24 hours and any egg needs to feed immediately upon hatching. So I declared the basement off limits for a few days to make sure that anything that might have fallen off a head would die off in a few days and then I could go clean the whole room without worry.  I didn't want to have to worry about the basement when I had the entire upstairs & main floor to deal with.

When my husband came home we decided that Juliet needed treatment first because she was the lord of the lice. Then we'd treat Sam & just shave his head... and then I'd treat myself last. Lucky for us my good friend Ashley came over to help. Thanks Ash. We treated Juliet and sat down to start the fun while my husband took care of Sam's treatment. Ridiculousness.

The amount of lice & nits (eggs) coming out of Juliet's hair was astonishing. Ashley had never seen anything like it even after suffering through the same ordeal with her own boys. Juliet's shoulder length hair was no help. We spent over an hour combing her hair until bedtime was 3 hours ago and Juliet just couldn't go on. And while shaving Sam's head was the way to go, I have to admit that when he came back downstairs I had to leave the room so that he wouldn't see me cry. He looked like a boy who was just released from a concentration camp... and it just broke my heart. My beautiful Sam, (although still beautiful)... looked horrible (way more so than in this pic). I couldn't handle it, and I didn't want him to know that. I was so upset that we had to do that because of these f*%!ING bugs!!!!!

Sam could care less. He likes his hair... or so he says. And obviously I never let on that I didn't. After returning to school today for the first time he came home & told me that his teacher & all his friends were stunned... and of you ask him he'll tell you that all his friends like his hair (phew). But to make matters worse (for me), he said that one girl on his bus said "yuck". Although it didn't phase him, it was very hard for me to hear.

As for poor Juliet... well I've spent at least 4 hours of each day under intense light picking nits out of her hair. A couple of hours or so first thing in the morning & another couple of hours before bed.

As of yesterday I was still finding live ones amongst the many, many nits so she had another treatment last night before bed. Although I've picked 20+ nits out today I haven't found any live ones so I think it's safe to say they are all dead. But until all the nits are gone we're not in the clear. All it takes is one missed nit to hatch & lay more eggs.

I seem to be in the clear though. Although we did find 3 lice in my hair the first night... there doesn't seem to be any trace of anything else. No lice, no nits. Thank god. So why is my head still itchy??!

As for the rest... I have done at least 20 loads of laundry in the past 48 hours (& counting). The upstairs has been stripped of anything that may carry lice that are just waiting to jump back onto a head for a snack. Vacuuming has been done. The kids linens are stripped everyday and re-washed along with all clothing & towels that we use. All stuffed animals & throw pillows have spent at least an hour in the dryer. It's not done yet but it's been 2 full days now and I think I can actually say we've got it under control. I can only hope that this means the end is in sight. If not... kill me. Or give me a cold sore... I'll trade lice for that.