Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Stumble...

So I guess it's about time to share a few more things that my StumbleUpon app has brought to my attention. I bring my iPhone into Sofie's room nightly so that I can either play games or stumble as I nurse... (whatever did I do before??) Given that I am still up a good 5-7 times throughout the night with her I had a good 10 emails in my inbox with links to the various websites I was stumbling.  Here are a few I found most interesting.

* We all know how much we LOVE instagram pics...this is such a great way to develop them!

* Check out these projects from photographer Mark Laita. It's the "CREATED EQUAL" that especially drew my attention.

* I recently said to my husband that we should really look into getting our scuba licenses because we live along the shores of some of Canada's most popular scuba sites. Once we do that (if ever) it would be SOOOO COOL (& creepy!!) to check out these wrecks.


* This picture is so beautiful that it almost makes me want to forget my wedding ever happened so we can get married here. This is the Wisteria Tunnel in the Kawachi Fuji Garden in Japan. You can google it for even more incredible photos.





 

* This website is so cool I don't really know what to say about it. All I know is that I hope one day I can creatively submit something of my own. It's definitely worth bookmarking because new photos are constantly added. It's just brilliant.

* HERE is a link to some of the National Geographic 2011 photo contest entries. There are some amazing pictures here. Photo #8 is my worst nightmare. It makes me shiver to just look at it... I couldn't imagine living anywhere NEAR there... (Insert shiver sound here).

That's all for now.  But with the amount of time I spend up at night nursing I should undoubtedly have a few more things to share in the very near future... Bonne Nuit!

Friday, April 20, 2012

Le Club Vert

Sam came home a couple of weeks ago with a new t-shirt he got from school. It's from "le club vert" he told us... a club he joined at school. "Why?" we asked.... "To take care of the planet".  How cute is that?



So the other day we were driving home from Ottawa and we had to pull off the highway so I could nurse away Sofie's screams. We stopped in one of those car pool parking lots. "Can we get out and look at the garbage?" Sam asks... "um... ok". So off he & Juliet went to investigate all the trash people had left behind. Across the parking lot there was a no littering sign that had fallen over. Together, Sam & Juliet worked to stand it back up... and they totally succeeded.



Back in the car, their discussion about all the garbage was so funny I had to start filming. This is what came out of that...





Saturday, April 14, 2012

Empty Bowls

Today was our local "soup kitchen's" annual fundraiser, Empty Bowls. It's something I look forward to every year... well for the last 2 at least since that's as long as we've been going.

So it works like this. Many local pottery artists (potters?) donate bowls and many local restaurants make AMAZING soups for the event. When you go the bowls are spread out on tables. There are TONS of them. You chose your bowl, and then you chose your soup. Eat your soup, and keep your bowl! It's fantastic! Last year there were NO vegetarian soups, other than plan old cream of broccoli. I was shocked... and it was an eye opener for the soup chefs. So... a couple of them promised that the next year they would make vegetarian soups. Well... they did just that. And it was not easy to chose my soup this year. Orange carrot ginger... Curried sweet potato & coconut... beet & fennel with horseradish cream. I went with the latter. My husband chose a cream of mushroom (bo-riiing) that he wasn't happy with and the kids had cream of roasted red peppers. They also serve bread, coffee, tea & dessert, accompanied by live music. It's fabulous. And the idea behind it is that every time you reach into your cupboard for the bowl you chose, you remember that it helped fill someone else's empty bowl!

These are the bowls we chose LAST year...



This year we chose these...





beet & fennel with horseradish cream... YUMMY!







Wednesday, April 11, 2012

The Abominable Easter Bunny

Sam brought this home today. Something about this screams KKK. Am I wrong?? The cross doesn't help the situation. I'm not sure I would like this bunny to deliver chocolate to my kids. It's like the abominable Easter Bunny. With a giant carrot.

Monday, April 9, 2012

Easter

So we made it through another holiday. Geez... It might as well be Christmas around here the way my kids get excited about Easter. They even count down the days. Is the Easter Bunny really that exciting? What could EB possibly leave that's better than what Santa does? The night before we decided to watch "HOP" to be festive and Juliet starts whining... "when will it be night time so it can be Easter tomorrow..." She couldn't even sit through a movie! Of course, Sam made all sorts of plans that involved sneaking down to the living room in the morning to see if EB had come, or rather what he had left behind. Of course... up at 6am he did just that. Then he wakes up Juliet for a full report. I'm surprised he even slept the night. I, on the other hand, didn't sleep the night and it wasn't because I was excited about the Easter Bunny. Miss Sofie was up FOUR times between midnight & 6am.... and Juliet up twice. That means I was up SIX TIMES between midnight & 6am. And at 6am I had to make sure Sam didn't wake Sofie up again with all his running around excited. FAIL. The kids made Easter cards for us at school and while Juliet gave us hers on Thursday Sam insisted on waiting until Easter morning. Apparently at 6am after reporting to Juliet he'd waited long enough. I got my card. Forget that it's Easter... With Sam, it's all about what is important to him when he's making it, so in celebration of his newly acquired roller blades Sam drew us all rollerblading.... very Easter-esque. I was wondering why we all had straight feet with a bunch of circles....


Saturday, April 7, 2012

StumbleUpon

I downloaded this new app called "StumbleUpon" that directs me to all sorts of websites that it thinks I would find interesting based on interests I input. It is awesome & addictive!! Sometimes after I put Sofie to sleep at night & should be sleeping myself  I will instead spend an hour "stumbling". It's ridiculous. It basically does all the web browsing for you and sends (mostly) really cool stuff to your inbox weekly. In the mean time you can go on and "stumble' any time you want to discover new sites. I'm going to try & make it a habit of sharing some of the cool things I find... or rather that find me.

Check out this cool light suit dance. You should really watch it ALL. I didn't find it on StumbleUpon but you should really see it anyway. So cool.

BORA BORA
Here are some AMAZING places to visit. At the bottom of the page you can click the links to see even more amazing places. I have ALWAYS dreamed of going to Bora Bora. If ever you ask me if there is one place I could go on vacation, Bora Bora has always been my answer. You can see why. Now I MUST also go to Croatia. Every photo I've seen is breathtaking. Check out Plitvice Lakes National Park ... BREATHTAKING.



Seychelles

  Another place... Seychelles, France. BEAUTY.








glass "sand" beach... awesommmmmme!


I almost collapsed when I stumbled upon this Glass beach site. SERIOUSLY? It's like heaven for me!

Here is an INCREDIBLE tattoo

This photographer has a series on Sky photography that is so beautiful. Love it. It's amazing how one thing can be soo soooooo different.




How cool is all of that??!! I'm not done yet...

Here is an AMAZING photo of flamingos. I freakin' love flamingos. It's on a site called One Big Photo. So amazing. So addictive. I just browse one photo after another. I've also tried to add some of my own photos to the site... hopefully they are good enough!!


And finally, for today, check out this "STUNNING" black & white photography by Hengki Koentjoro. I've always thought black & white photography was amazing. Some of these photos take it to a whole new level. Enjoy!



Friday, April 6, 2012

our fam

My blog is lacking. I wish I had more time to post because I have lots of stuff I want to share. I'm still having a REALLY REALLY hard time with Sofie. Tonight I got a chance to write a letter to my midwife. It sort of sums up what I am going through right now & how I feel about it. It's pretty emo but I am desperately hoping that she might be able to help us somehow. I wonder a bit if I should be sharing this on my blog... is it too personal? I don't think so. This blog is about my life & my family & this is what we are going through right now. This is how I express myself. So... In the event that you might be interested in hearing all about my hardships (again) with a new baby here's an excerpt from my letter. You'd think I'd have this baby rearing thing down pat by now. Evidently not.

... It all started out wonderfully but as the days went on she became more and more difficult. More crying, less sleeping. Her crying isn't quiet either. She screams bloody murder. It's now to a point where I just don't know what to do. From the minute we get up in the morning to the minute I can finally get her to sleep at night she is either crying or nursing. There is hardly an in between. Mere minutes of the day are spent not nursing or crying. I am the only one who can calm her because the only thing that clams her is to nurse. I am not exaggerating when I say that my ENTIRE day is spent on the couch nursing. She will fall asleep but will wake up almost as soon as I pull my nipple from her mouth. She basically does not nap at all during the day. Some days I will spend hours nursing her until she falls asleep, putting her down, and having her wake up minutes later to start all over again. Eventually I give up trying to nap her. Her nights are not so bad. She wakes up every couple of hours, some nights she will sleep longer. What is difficult during the night is getting her back to sleep.... but that is not even what concerns me. It's the daytime. We changed her formula a few times at first and ended up giving her a gentle formula with less lactose. But that didn't change anything. And now she barely takes a bottle so I don't think it's a formula thing. We've tried drops for colic, although I really don't think she has "colic". I've even given her chamomile & fennel tea because I read that it is supposed to be soothing for babies. No difference. She is not constipated, in fact her poo is quite liquid. Sometimes her poo is pretty mucousy (if that is even a word). But I assume this is normal in breastfed babies. While there are days that she has quite a bit of gas, I really don't think there is anything wrong with her. This is just how she is. I feel like if there was something actually wrong, even nursing wouldn't calm her, or there would be other symptoms. She does move a lot. If we put her in her bouncy chair for the small amount of time she will be alright in it, she kicks her legs vigorously. If you ask me though, it does not appear to be because she is in pain. She will do it without crying. Like I said... I am reluctant to believe there is anything "wrong" with her... she is just a difficult (very difficult) baby. It's like she is happy... to nurse. She smiles at me... she even smiles at her Dad sometimes. But ultimately all she wants to do is lie in my arms and be able to nurse all the time. Otherwise it's crying (screaming).

... Although I am physically exhausted, I am way more mentally exhausted. There are many precious moments you are supposed to enjoy with a new baby, and I feel that the only moments I am enjoying are the ones where I am getting a (very short) break from Sofie. This hurts me emotionally. I spend a lot of time nursing & crying because I am just so overwhelmed. Another thing that burns me emotionally is that I feel like I am not at all present in my other 2 kids lives right now. For everything they ask of me my answer is almost always "I can't because I have to nurse Sofie". The times where I am present with them 9 out of 10 times Sofie is screaming hysterically in the background or we are all sitting on the couch while I am nursing. This doesn't appear to affect them, but it greatly affects me. They definitely don't have the best of their mother right now, even when I am able to focus on them. It breaks my heart. My husband is off work now so he is 100% focused on taking care of them, but it is difficult for me to be so out of touch. My husband cannot take care of Sofie. She won't allow it. Some mornings after the kids are on the bus he can come and get her for a bottle while I sleep for a bit, but those are becoming fewer & fewer. Sofie is no longer interested in taking a bottle, in fact it makes her scream. It, along with a soother, is like a huge insult because what she really wants is the boob. So any breaks I get from her are vanishing.

Going out & about is very difficult too. Any time we have gone to run errands with Sofie I find myself scurrying off to nurse somewhere to stop her incessant crying. So her & I don't go out much because it's just easier to stay home. When the weather was nice for a bit we spent a lot of time outside, but even then the nursing just moved from the couch to a chair on the deck.

I have had friends mention that maybe I should stop nursing, but I can't even entertain the idea. First off, as crazy as it seems, I don't want to stop. I can't imagine taking away the one thing that is not only the best for her, but what she enjoys the most. I just wish there was a way to make it easier. With my other 2 kids, nursing was such a special time for me. With Sofie, although there are times it is special, it has become so difficult because it has taken over our lives. The idea of stopping is just as emotionally damaging to me as everything else. I don't know what to do. I find it difficult to believe this is normal. I know that a new baby is a lot of time & attention, but this seems outrageous. If my husband wasn't off work, I wouldn't be able to do it. I wouldn't be able to focus on Sam & Juliet. That makes me feel horrible as a mother because I feel like I should be able to take care of all 3 of my children. The only way I can put Sam & Juliet's needs first is to let Sofie scream, which is what happens if my husband is out during suppertime, or any other time Sam & Juliet need my undivided attention. Thankfully that very rarely happens because he is off work... but it doesn't stop me from feeling horrible about it. How do other moms do it? Not everyone has the privilege of having 2 parents at home. This just adds to my emotional exhaustion.

... I thought I could write to you because you have been with us from the start, and with your experience you may have some answers or ideas for us. I keep telling myself this will all be over eventually but I'm just worried about how long 'eventually' will be. Some days are easier than others. Some days I can handle it. But there are days that I just cry & want to scream because I can't handle it. I don't want to say "I don't know how much more of this I can take" because I am a mother... and I will take it.. every bit of it. But I am still exhausted... and maybe there is something you could say or suggest to help me. Arghhhhhhh!!!

So there you have it. Hopefully the next time I blog about this it will be better. I am really so excited to have 3 kids I just wish it was easier. I can't wait for this difficult time to be over so I can REALLY enjoy all 3 of them.

I really need to go to sleep... but I just wanted to share with you something that Sam brought home from school, which was really the intention of this post. It's his rendition, in plasticine, of our family. It's fabulous.



There's Papa, me & Sofie, Sam & Juliet. Isn't it great!! I LOVE it. I love when my kids are crafty. I love Juliet's drawings, even when they are about bad guys & bad guy families (which was her latest drawing). I should really do more crafts with them.